hey,

well, 2022 just passed for 5 months and now the 6th month just about to began. actually, since January 2022 i've been thru hell, i've been messed up, fucked up, battling with my self, my head and my heart. i've been crying up all night and trying to seems be happy like everything's okay the next morning for about 3 weeks? idk, i dont even wanna remember that fucking nights and days. until i finally talk to my self like "you're done here. it's time for u to pull yourself together and welcoming the brand new days with new you and new perspective!" oh btw, for the past 5 months i never be alone. idk but i think Allah use His power to accompany me by sending me the good people around and beside me. people who loves me, accept and appreciate me as i am, they comfort me, makes me laugh and laugh at my jokes. i'm so happy yet grateful to have that people in my life. they know how to treat the fragile me and never leave me when i'm broke. they told me that i'm worth it, they always remind me to love my self more, they told me that i'm beautiful, i'm smart enough and i deserve better, they told me that i'm precious and they rise me up. 

now. here i am today. the new me who already make a peace with the old me. the new me who can stand by my own feet, who appreciate the moments more, who loves more, give more, and recieve more loves from my circles. i'm happy today, i promise to love my self more until no one can messed me up anymore. i'm survived! and i'm strong than i thought. so dear you who read this blog, remember that you deserve happiness. and when you on the lowest point in your life just remember that Allah will always be your side and He wont leave you alone.

cheers!

ririaprilia

you are doing better than you think you are. you have had more experiences than you can remember, and they were better than you can recall. you've felt more happiness, known more joy, found more inspiration, and have succeeded more times than you are aware of when you're in your most doubtful moments. you've been more accepted than you remember--more appreciated, seen, and validated than you know. more people saw your potential than you realize. they liked you more than you believe. you were more wanted than you think, by friends, by family, by potential lovers who londed for you in ways you probably never would have imagined in the first place. when the people closest to you look at you, they see far more of your greatness than you ever would looking at yourself. it's easy to define ourselves by the empty spaces, the ways in which we lack. yet those are not always gaps within us waiting to be filled, rather, the simple contrast between all we are and all we were never meant to be.

-brianna wiest

Beautiful

What she had been through never really bothered her.

Even though the world often didn't love her, it was the world she fell hopelessly in love with.

She knew nothing is granted but appreciated everything that came to her.

Even when she was hurting, she let it hurt until it went away.

She was the most peace I have known, and she walked in all of that, as if she was just an ordinary girl,

but she was the most beautiful, not in just how she looked, but in how she thought.

- v e n t u m

Sun & Moon

there is this story about these two,

that the world isn't brave enough to write.

the moon is cold and hurting while the sun is in his pain, burning,

and once in a while they meet, but too rarely to call it love.

so, the world calls those moments eclipses instead,

trying to collide in the form of a red light and perhaps the almost do.

but they never will, and the saddest part about these two is,

they never knew.

- v e n t u m

Pagi

Pagi selalu membawa sebuah cerita
Pikiranku tertuju pada mu saat pertama aku membuka mata
Entah apa yang hati ini rasa, namun dirimu ada seakan nyata

Pagi selalu membawa sebuah cerita
Setelah sekian bulan sejak awal kita berjumpa
Pertemuan pertama antara aku dan kamu seakan tak pernah bisa aku lupa

Pagi selalu membawa sebuah cerita
Rindu ini selalu ada, untuk kamu yang disana
Tepatnya di sebuah kota istimewa

Pagi selalu membawa sebuah cerita
Akankah sebuah tanda tanya dapat berubah menjadi asa?
Akankah rasa ini menjelma menjadi cinta?

Bagaimana pagimu disana?
Aku harap kamu baik-baik saja


by. ririaprilia

Raksasa Dari Jogja

"jemari Gabriel mengisi celah-celah kecil di jemari Bianca. Itulah mengapa ada celah-celah kecil di jari manusia. karena, akan ada saatnya celah-celah kecil tersebut diisi oleh orang yang tepat. yang akan setia mengenggam tanganmu dalam keadaan apapun. kini, Bianca dan Gabriel sibuk menatap hujan, menikmati derasnya, menikmati bau tanah basahnya. adakah yang lebih indah dari menatap hujan di Jogjakarta bersama seseorang yang selalu ada dalam tangis dan tawamu?"

-Narasi by Bianca dari film Raksasa Dari Jogja

Jogja

source; Google.com

Jogja bagiku bukan hanya kota
ia adalah tempat dimana hati ini bermuara
cinta yang hadir tanpa bisa disangka-sangka
memberikan cerita tentang aku dan dia

Jogja bagiku bukan hanya kota
ia adalah tempat setiap anak muda untuk memiliki cerita
bagaikan kisah Cinta dan Rangga
dalam film Ada Apa Dengan Cinta 2

Jogja bagiku bukan hanya kota
ia adalah tempat dimana kenangan ini selalu ada
memberikan warna dalam hati yang putus asa
membawa tawa di setiap kisahnya

terimakasih padamu, Jogja
bagaikan aksara akhir dalam lagu Katon Bagaskara,
izinkan aku untuk pulang kembali, melengkapi cerita di setiap sudut kota
mencari harapan yang dahulu sempat sirna...

padamu Jogja,
Kamu telah membuat aku jatuh cinta.


by. ririaprilia